Peace of My Mind

Soooo, I dont know why this didn’t post the first time.  Im in the process of moving my blog completely to wordpress.  This was supposed to be my Intro post: 

 

Hey Everyone!!!!
So. I’ve been thinking about starting a blog for a lonnnnnnngggggg time lol.  I just wanted to use this first post to give you a brief explanation of the name and myself.  I am 24 years old, and I’ve been writing since I was about 13 years old. I started off writing poetry, but now I write spoken word.   My writing came from a place of pain and I used it for release mostly.  My teenage (and some of my adult) years were filled with depression and so I used writing as an outlet to express my pain. Writing could only do so much for me, because to be honest I was using it as my drug.  As soon as the high came down I was feeling just as I did before I put the pen to the paper.  In 2008, I wrote a poem entitled “My Drug” (found below, its not my best writing, but it’s the skill level I was at back then lol) where I described how it wasn’t until I gave my issues to Christ that I obtained total peace of mind.  The name “Peace of My Heart and Mind” came to my head because of this and this blog is to encourage, uplift, discuss everyday things that can help us grow, and to have some fun.  I want to use my writing  as a ministry.  This is me giving what used to be my idol, over to God and letting him use it for his glory.  My full testimony is coming later, but look for spoken word pieces, discussions, and other cool things.  Thanks for reading! 🙂

“My Drug”
 
I smoked away the pain, hurt, sadness and depression/
Even the happiness, good times and Obsessions/
Sometimes Embarrassment, change, anger, and crazy thoughts
Even the randomness, silliness, and truths that couldn’t be fought.
 
I was a true addict, got it whenever I could get it/
Feigned, longed, and fought for it, to my drug I was committed.
 
So selfish with it, I didn’t even think about sharing/
So I kept it all to myself, my burdens I kept carrying.
 
I soon realized that this drug wasn’t doing much for me, it tore me down instead of building me
Weakened instead of stregnthened me, and did its best to keep breaking and breaking me.  
 
I needed to get help but this was such a strong addiction/
and I was convinced I couldn’t quit it.
 
You see, I wrote and i wrote until I couldn’t feel the pain, shame
or until a numbness was obtained.
 
The problem with this, is writing never disappears.  You can rip or tear it, burn it or destroy it, fact remains
 is what’s on the paper and in your heart is exactly the same.
 
And so you need something greater to deal with the hurt, something much bigger to deal with the pain
so others and yourself you can stop putting to blame.
 
It wasn’t until later that I found this “something”
and I thought it was too late because I was self-destructing.  
 
But he came right on time and said “I know you’re hurting
 don’t give up so easily let me take those burdens.”
 
He said “Take rest in me for my yoke is easy, and what you’re going through, I know its not easy, but if you put your trust n me, I’ll take care of it, and give you a testimony so you can share it with others, and testify about me to your sisters and brothers.”
 
 
He said “For I know the thoughts that I think towards you…thoughts of peace and not of evil..” So it doesn’t matter what they say, and then he began to mold and grow in me day after day.  

 

 
I found a new addiction…but this is good for me.   I have the munchies for his word and I’m destined to be what he’s called me to be.
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