I was sitting on my bed, I didn’t really have words to say for prayer so I said just that; “I don’t really know how to put this into words.” All of a sudden I was reminded of the scripture: Matthew 27:46 “And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” I broke down crying. This was not because I was overwhelmed or extremely sad, I honestly cannot think of an emotion to accurately describe why I was in full blown tears lol. I guess you could say that I was blown away. Jesus made himself so real to me in this moment. God who wrapped himself in flesh to come down, live as man, and die for my sins was made so real to me tonight. I have had these realization moments before, but tonight was different. I began to think about the moment of that scripture when Jesus cried out “Why have you forsaken me?” and what came to mind was that Jesus has LITERALLY felt every feeling that we have felt.
If you’ve been following me for a while you know that I am extremely transparent, and today is no different. I know very well that the bible says that God will never leave or forsake me, but I also know that suffering will cause you to cry out “WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!” I can relate to Jesus in this matter, (no I do not equate my very small issues to calvary and the crucifixion of Jesus Christ) I thank God that I serve a God that i can relate to by going to his word and seeing in scripture that Jesus is relatable. There’s no feeling that I am feeling that he hasn’t experienced, there’s no situation that he cannot understand, there’s nothing that I can go through in my life that I can’t find the answer to in his life, and because of this there is absolutely NOTHING that I cannot talk to him about. So many times we hear “God is
tired of hearing you pray about the same thing.” First of all, God does NOT get tired and secondly, If I have to come to him everyday until something is off of my heart I believe that it is worth it (sorry for that little rant, but I can’t stand unbiblical church talk lol). If you feel abandoned, worried, tired, whatever the case…you’re not alone, and if no one else understands please know and understand that there is a Savior that wants to have a relationship with you where you can give him everything and rest in him. That is soooooo comforting to me!
This last thing is what has a HUGE grin on my face:
Matthew 27:50 And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice, and yielded up His spirit. 51 And behold, the [a]veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom…”
When Jesus gave up his spirit (died), because he was the living sacrifice for our sins there was no longer a separation between God and man! The veil of the temple was what separated man from the holy place of the temple. The veil being torn represented that that separation wasn’t there anymore, which means that we have access to God. When we die to ourselves, and allow Christ to live in us we have access to a personal relationship with God.
So, whatever you are going though…set that aside, yield to the spirit and talk to the one who understands. He’s there with open arms.